Help on Marriage Visa to move to England?

I'm trying to move to England if I can. I'm thinking about marrying this English lass(girl) from Newcastle Upon Tyne. I have learned much about England's anthem, culture, cities, crime, and it's festivals like stripping of the colour. I have also initially learned American English but before mastering it I decided to learn British English Instead ( that's what they call it ) and now I speak perfect South East Londoner English so it's cool but I had a hard time at first with slang but finally use it for everyday use. My gf is pleased by my progress as I have got the right speech to live in England, now my question is. How long and how many times do I have to travel there as in back and forth to marry and move with her. Yes I do know that it's not London I'm moving to, it's Newcastle but I love the Geordies better:) Any help would be appreciated, thank you guys, and I do know that the media shows shite covered in sugar to make England really seem golden. I have many mates from there so I should have a good idea of what it's like there:)
Added (1). Update: I meant Trooping the colour soz:/
Added (2). Suspicious of what? I really want to live with her and she does too, not doi8ng anything illegal here or fake or scandalous either. People do real bad things and get in other countries still. I have intentions of embracing the culture entirely to its fullest.
Added (3). I can tell you that I'm very serious about it. I'm not planning to pass on my last name to my kids, let her have the honours. I don't feel like having kids as well and if she doesn't wanna have any between us and wants to adopt, I fully agree with her. I'd rather help orphans have a better life than have my own kids, specially in the UK where I wish to make them have a better life.
Added (4). I'll do anything to help others in the UK just to make it better for them, because I was an orphan that always wished to have somebody to care for me. I did not, I want to make these children have a family. It's my main goal in life:)
Added (5). And like I said, I have no interest in being an illegal migrant or live off of welfare. I believe I have to be an asset to England not a liability like those Muslims and blacks there, I wanna do good not crime guys so sorry if I offend any of you in any way( yea I know the UK is a coalition between England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland)
And Great Britain is just the island that has all but Northern Ireland:)

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